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| This is me. |
I have to apologize to my readers - all 3 of you (kisses!). I haven't been writing much lately, and I will tell you why:
Because I have nothing to say.
No, seriously. I mean, I could write about my daily adventures to the mall (aka my place of work) and the work that I do, but that would just be boring. Also, I'm not entirely sure what I do.
So, knowing I needed to get my shit together and start writing more frequently or risk losing the minimal interest that people have in this blog, I decided to ask Google for some blog ideas. My thought was to use the ideas suggested to write a humourous and thought provoking post that would tug at heart strings while simultaneously entertaining and engaging my readers.
What I found were, like, 101 of the gayest ideas I've ever heard. So, naturally, I picked the dumbest ones and decided to criticize them in this post. So I guess it gave me something to write about, after all. Google, you're so awesome like that.
Run a contest. I'm pretty sure contests are supposed to have prizes. Which...no. And also, what would I do a contest for? The most awkward and embarrassing sex story? Actually...
Giveaway. Much like the whole contest prize thing, I'm not really on board with that. I could probably give away like...something from Dollarama. And then that would involve shipping to the winner of the giveaway and that's just too much work. But hey, don't get me wrong - I get that people love free stuff. I'm one of them. Once, I signed up for a credit card because I liked the t-shirt they were giving away. No, for reals. I did. I still have the t-shirt, too. It was from my University. Cha gheill!
Criticize a blog or person. Oh, hey, I'm doing that now! That's fun. Let's just continue, shall we? The suggestions under this topic are to make sure that your arguments are well thought out and firmly based in fact, and to avoid random ranting as it is pointless. HowEVER, I'm firmly dedicated to random ranting and going off about things that I have little - if any - solid information about. So I don't think this works for me.
Tell a personal secret. Yeah the fuck right. I like to keep my actual personal life relatively private. Sure, I'll make jokes and tell about things that happen to me with the people in my life, but like HELL am I going to start telling secrets on here. That's for when I'm rip roaring drunk and feeling extra lovey and share-y. Duh.
Write an inspirational or motivational post with famous quotes. I don't want people to hate me because I'm being all happy and inspirational and all "life is beauty-ful, yay!" I say that because those people bug me. You know, the happy and optimistic ones. Gross. (Unless of course you guys want some happy and inspirational posts, in which case I will Google those quotes SO fast).
Write down all the thoughts you had in your mind today. Umm, that's for Twitter, y'all.
Write down your monthly budget and personal expenses. This one makes me laugh. I don't have a personal budget. Because I don't have any money. Because I don't know how to budget. You see where I'm going with this? I COULD write a blog about how much money I spend on things that I don't need and/or already have - makeup, shoes, purses, candy - but then my parents might read it and I would get in trouble. Sad face. (Yes, I am an adult. Yes, I make my own money. And yes, sometimes I have to answer to my parents about my money because when I run out, they need to bail me out. Daughter of the YEAR. Also I love my parents).
Alright, I should probably do some work now. Kisses, hugs, and rainbows to all.
Love,
M
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