I follow a Twitter account called “The Single Woman”. I can practically hear M snickering and making fun of me for a) being single and b) being a “sad, lonely girl” who takes inspiration from quotes from other people that are trying to make it okay to be single. I know this because he does this to me on a regular basis, including telling me that I will never get married or that, because I say I don’t need a man, I am a lesbian (I’m getting this on the table now as I know he’ll just come back to me with it if I don’t). But instead of the account being about why it’s okay to be single, it’s about not apologizing for who you are, what you want, and what you need.
Just because people think you should be or do something, it doesn’t mean that it’s right for you. I had to really look at what I wanted and how I felt, and it was only then that I realized that I’m happy being where I am right now – essentially, single. This point in my life works for me, despite the fact that some people may not get it. Do I go home to an empty apartment? Do I sleep alone at night? Yes. And I love it. I LIKE to be on my own. I can lounge around in my underwear and leave my stuff everywhere and no one can say shit about it. I get an entire Queen size bed to myself. I don’t have to check with anyone before I do things. I don’t have to worry that some menopausal, moody man is going to get upset because I spend time with myself or my friends instead of him. I realize that my life may not work for everyone, but it does for me. And that’s all I need.
I’ve stopped making excuses for why I live the way I do. And you should, too. Are you happy? Do you feel fulfilled? Then keep doing exactly what you’re doing. You are too amazing, too fabulous, and too smart to be doing anything other than what makes your life worth living.
Love,
M
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